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Be your own Valentine!

today, the idea and practice of „mindfulness“ has taken on near magical hocus pocus dimensions. We think that mindfulness is some sort of thing we can do, to reduce stress, find life's meaning, or some other such thing. And we meditate trying to find some release from these things. The truth? We are always mindful of something. Regardless of our state. Even when we are asleep our minds are looking at something. We tend to think, that only thoughts with words are thoughts. So we try and use apps that "guide" us through mindful meditations to "arrive" in the present moment. These things overlook the point. No "arrival" is required. No "guide" or journey is required. We are already there. As a matter of fact, no other moment exists for us. We remember the past, we can plan for the future, and we can think of things that are not here presently, but, in fact, none of those things exist in our present state. Our culture likes to take things even further than listening to voices that are not there, and give us some sort of "ideal" or "should be" to live up to. Things should be this way or that way. I need to create a better version of myself. All illusions. We latch onto them, because we have an inflated view of our own importance. Our schools tell us how "special" we are, our parents, teachers, and society offers us the proverbial carrot to follow so that we can become some type of hero. The problem? The reward only comes after we die or become some sort of living dead. The deeds we do to get this reward are nearly always something that doesn't come from inside us but was planted there by a well-meaning society. This society is a construct of our minds, but doesn't actually physically exist. We think it is protection against the dangers of nature, but if we are honest, the most dangerous place to be is in a crowd of humans. Both from the violence they could potentially inflict and even the diseases we give each other. If we could deconstruct the idea of our own specialness and exceptional place in the world, we would find it easier to let go of things that are not actually here, and allow the moment we are actually living to be what it is. Then, we might actually feel our own inner impulses and learn to trust that they are not evil. Try this: while walking or sitting, just observe. Allow things to be what they are, don't name the things you see, just look at them. Hear the sounds around you, but just hear them, don't name the sounds or the things making the sounds. Feel the clothing on your skin, the air moving around you. Smell the things in the air, see if you can taste the things that are left over in your mouth. The key: don't ask what it is, just perceive. At some point the “inner voices” will slow down or at least become quieter. At this point you can begin to feel different parts of your body. If you are sitting still this will be easier. Move your attention to different parts starting wherever you feel like. Again, don't try to identify the what, just feel. If something causes distress follow it. It might tell you something. Let it show, if there are pictures, sounds, voices, feelings that come to mind, maybe they are things you have not dealt with from your past. This obviously, is not medical advice. If you feel severe pain or some other strong symptoms, you may need medical help. Don't hesitate to seek out such help if need be . .

Just be yourself

All things are made of the same stuff.

In our world we continue to talk about success. Success has become an idol in western society, and is beginning to pollute the whole world. It is literally a cancer that is killing all that remains of our humanity, but we keep thinking, like the christian monks that used to whip themselves, if we just do this or that enough or tweek this or that enough, or "pimp" ourselves enough, we'll find the secret to success. Pimp is a fitting word. We sell our bodies and life energy to the highest bidder and let them do with us what we want. What do we get in return? little or nothing, but some money and the feeling, however short-lived, of being a success. This kind of thinking robs us of all living power within us, it binds us to things that we didn't really choose. And it mistakes identification for identity. To identify with something is like branding ourselves with a mark.. our identity is inherent even down to our very DNA. Life is like a river that flows. If we learn to ride that river, we can flow with life. When things happen: like when we feel sad, depressed, angry, etc we have the ability to ask ourselves what is the message behind this feeling, this symptom, or whatever. Once we understand the message the symptom is giving us, we can deal with it appropriately. Or let it take it's course. If we keep trying to define things we'll end up using our life force until we ultimately die a quick and painful death. Not ever really having lived, because a life that is constantly defined and affirmed by others is not our life but theirs. The life that is our life, where we flow and allow ourselves to develop over time, has true physical, spiritual, and emotional power. A life, where we think we have to be someone, something, or look and act a certain way is giving away all that we have. So how do we find this? The techniques are pretty simple, as they are not really "techniques". Like all others, try and engage your five senses. Just sit in the park, and see, hear, smell, maybe even taste things. Don't tell yourself to do it, just do it. Feel yourself sitting on that bench or wherever. Feel the texture. Feel the things you body is touching. Do all of these things with as little noise from your inner chatterbox as possible. And then wait. Wait until you feel an impulse to do something, but don't examine what it is, don't ask, just do it. Keep this part simple.. i.e. Like where to go in the park, which plants to look at. If something "feels" interesting to look at, do it, again with as many senses as possible, and as little of that chatterbox as possible. Most of the words we speak to ourselves are from others anyway. If you can do this for a while in the park, you can slowly do it for longer and practice life this way. You'll find yourself in the things you do. And find which things you're doing because someone else told you to and which things come from you. If you're looking for a way not to feel sad, or sick, or only "good feelings", Kuji-in and the type of hypnosis that I do, will not help you. As only zombies only have "good feelings" all the time. Life is so much more than "success".

Toh

Today's blog is about responsibility. Much talk and attention has been given to the concept of karma as well as cause and effect. So much so that we have begun to feel that we can affect the events in our surroundings simply by the way we feel and think. While I believe this is the case to a certain degree, I'm not really interested in discussing this here at any length. Too much weight is placed on these ideas, so that we feel we can control those things by "feeling" a certain way. If we simply change how we feel, hocus pocus our dreams come true and we live happily ever after. The other side of the control spectrum I like to call the machine shed. The doing crowd.. the philosophy there is: if I just do the right things, all will be well. Biohackers fall into this category. As well as many religious people. Check all the boxes and bingo, my soul is safe from damnation. All of these things deny one main thing: life! Life is full of beauty, ugliness, pleasure, pain, joy, sadness, etc. From a very young age I understood that love and hate were not opposites, but two sides to the same coin.. their opposite is indifference. To live is to be responsible to control is suicide on the installment plan. Responsibility begins with the fundamental trust in ourselves and in life, and then accepting ourselves, our lives, and all those things entail. If we are sad, or tired, or jealous, or angry, etc and we pretend that we are not, because we feel that we should not be, we lose the ability to find the source of those feelings, and then to let them go, in due time. We also turn ourselves into a zombie. We say these feelings are not valid, and if we only feel good feelings, there won't be any ugliness. Trust in ourselves allows us to take responsibility for our anger (for example) and then use or channel it in a constructive way.. or, if faced with a real live threat, destructive way. I cannot be responsible for my anger, if I do not allow myself to feel it, I can only control it.. if I control it, it will find it's way into my body, tight muscles, digestive issues, headaches etc.. will result. Think of all those places where you hold tension or pain in your body.. ask yourself, if there is something in which you're not living out your responsibility fully, then breathe and accept your emotions. Allow yourself to be silent. Too many of us are constantly chattering away in our own mind.. as if there were two of us here. Breathe, inhabit, feel, taste, smell, hear, see your emotions and then breathe, inhabit, feel, taste, smell, hear, and see your responsibility for them, even if you do not want it. Once this is established, it becomes easier to see what effect our states have on the things around us. And how they influence us. Only then do we realize that things like guilt and shame, are tools of someone or something that seeks to control. Quantum physicists have discovered that an atom essentially is nothing at it's core. That the structure is what makes it have mass and not it's "substance" Much like life the only way to see "the bottom" or "the inside" is to destroy it. Trying to control it also does the same thing.